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Post Game: 5 Dos and Don’ts

November 4, 2011

Post game car rides after athletic events can be a powerful time of bonding with your kids or a terribly destructive relationship destroyer.  Some of it is what we say and some of it is how we say it.  Here are 5 Dos and Don’ts for the post-game car ride.


1.Ask your child how he/she felt the game went for him personally and for the team?  How are they feeling right now?

2.Ask what was the highlight of the game for her?

3.Ask what do you learn from playing in this game?

4.Ask were you happy with your preparation before the game and focus and effort level during the game?

5.Ask what would you like to see different the next time you play?


1.Ask your son about a specific play where he made a mistake (he will bring it up without prompting).

2.Compare your daughter’s performance to others on the team.

3.Belittle the coaches’ strategy or use of players in front of your son.

4.Accuse your daughter  of not being mentally tough or not trying hard enough.

5.Run up to your son’s coach after a tough loss and complain about his playing time (always a bad idea) and then discuss the conversation with your son.

These simple Dos and Don’ts will take the tension out of the post-game car ride and actually give it a chance to be a pleasant relationship building time.

Patrick Donohue is a Life Coach in Oak Park, IL. Contact him at

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